mommyblogsideofwife

  It's strange sometimes. I sit here pondering to ponder. My words and feelings I feel sometimes they don't matter. Yet I can still see some hurtful words thrown at me.  Please don't wish harm on someone. It will come back to you. I promise. I promise because I used to be that girl. Not anymore. I like myself the way I am.  I told once I didn't have any friends. I was once told I hope I hurt. I still think about those words.  I look at my friends. I do have solid friendships.  I was looking for validation to the wrong friends. I was seeking something that I already have.  It's nice. It's nice to have those real voices that actually care about my feelings and words.  I am not lonely, I do not hurt, I am at peace.  Right now I am going through something that I can't really talk about. It has nothing to do with friendships.  So while I am on this journey. I hope you have peace if you read this.

I sat on this topic for a while. I thought about it for a long time. When you get yourself involved with toxic people. You do become toxic as well. I realized I was that person who became extremely toxic. I sabotaged some friendships on purpose because there was some toxic people around me. I seeing myself in the mirror becoming them. I didn't want to be around them anymore.I didn't want to be a part of that world. I was becoming a vile human being. So I did what I needed to do. After math was not lonely as they thought I would feel. I actually okay where I am now. However, when you tell someone I hope they hurt. That will come back to you. I am not sure what has happen to those toxic people. I care not to know. I moved on. I am in a happier mindset.  I am getting up, I am cleaning up my life little by little. That's okay. It's perfectly find just to disappear without a trace. Because the satisfaction is not there to watch you suffer. That's the worst feeling when